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Ryan Gosling, in the middle of making all the money.

Happy happy joy joy, folks! This week’s list is almost nothing but good news! Retaining the top spot is Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy with only a 25% drop and £2.1 million in ticket sales, destroying second place. So some slightly negative word of mouth (“It’s booooring!” “It’s confuuuuusing!” “I have no good taste in moooooviees!”) couldn’t stop the intelligent, thoughtful, slow-burning masterpiece (or, so I’ve heard) from keeping number 1.

As for the new entries; Crazy, Stupid, Love (what is it with films featuring commas, nowadays?) won out with £860,000 for second place. Warrior would have closely followed it into third place with £808,000… But that was released on a Wednesday. So it instead took £622,000 and drops to fourth. Killer Elite depressingly only came in seventh with £481,000, possibly detailing two depressing things to the world. 1] The world is finally sick of Jason Statham movies. 2] Yvonne Strahovski’s career is dead in the water once Chuck finishes. And I can tell you for a fact the answers to those statements are, “Hell no!” and “You’re dead to me for even thinking that” respectively.

But the big winner of the week was Drive. Sure, it only made fifth place and £600,000, but that was from 176 screens with a per screen average of £3,451. Which, for an 18 rated wide release-ish movie, is fantastic! Well done, Screened community and people of the UK! Let’s try and make it stick for the next few weeks!

Finally, on the preliminary round-up, Jurassic Park was re-released on 276 screens and made a sh*tty £245,422 for eleventh place. Soul Surfer opened on 149 screens, made £47,293 and everybody laughed this Christian propaganda piece right outta town. Mauasam, the week’s Indian movie, made £188,488 on 42 screens. And I Don’t Know How She Does It completely dropped off the top 10 list. And not one single f*ck was given.

Crazy, Stupid, Full, List.

UK Box Office Results: 23rd September - 25th September 2011

	1. Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy £2,104,762 / £6,924,269 Here comes an actual, real zero star review of this movie off of the VUE website where the film currently sits with a 3 and a half star average score. "The most boring, slow-moving film I've ever seen. Confusing flashbacks, too many characters to keep track of and I didn't understand what was going on at all. I feel asleep half-way through and only stuck it out because my boyfriend wanted to watch it all! It hasn't inspired me to read the book at all. Dull dull dull." Stupid? Idiotic? Moron? You be the judge.
	2. Crazy, Stupid, Love. £860,112 / NEW So people prefer "Suave, Sexy" Ryan Gosling to "Quite Possibly The Finest Actor Of His Generation" Ryan Gosling. Or, rather, cinema chains prefer that Ryan Gosling. Good to know (!)
	3. The Inbetweeners Movie £754,226 / £43,284,169 Inching ever closer to becoming the second highest grossing movie of the year. It’s basically unstoppable at this point. The question isn’t "If it'll beat The King's Speech" it's "When will it beat The King's Speech?"
	4. Warrior £622,029 / £808,410 / NEW So this'll probably bomb. Shame, really. I like the look of it. In fact, why can't I watch this too? Why can't I go to the cinema? "Dad, why can't I go to the cinema? I need to review, gorram it!"
	5. Drive £607,454 / NEW Need further proof that humanity doesn't deserve nice things? This is currently sitting on a 2 and a half star average on VUE's website. Here's the most scathing review. "i am so dissapointed with this film ! i thought it was going to be so good because of all the raiting it had got from flixster rotten tomatoes !! paid for VIP and it was so not worth it ! the film was so slowwww ! take ages to the get to the point and when it did the film finished ! the ending was stupid ! everything about it was rubbish. me and my bf gt so confused through out the film. there wasnt even much driving scene !! even doe it called drive !! HATE IT !!!!1" Just goes to show; you make two of the best contenders for Film Of The Year, and the douchebag, moronic, grammar Nazi public will spit them back in your face whilst screaming, "BWING MI MOAR TRANSFORMERS!!"
	6. Friends with Benefits £580,641 / £5,309,886 Remember when Justin Timberlake used to be a musician...?
	7. Killer Elite £481,143 / NEW Now; I know that nobody on this site has ever said otherwise, but just in case, here’s proof that Yvonne Strahovski can act!
	8. Jane Eyre £445,455 / £3,884,955 The Kids Are Alright is on Sky Movies Premiere right now. Do you lot think it's worth watching? I'm intrigued by it, but uncertain.
	9. The Smurfs £410,817 / £15,954,669 Finally! Finally! F*cking finally! We're saying goodbye to The Smurfs! It's over! The nightmare is finally over! Oh, somebody kiss me!
	10. The Change-Up £378,226 / £1,631,363 Let it be known; that on this weekend, more people wanted to watch a baby projectile sh*t into Jason Bateman's mouth than the theatrical re-release of a movie that is infinitely better but most people already own on about seventy different formats and have watched about 68 times already! Truly... mankind is f*cked (!)

Dropped Out: I Don’t Know How She Does It, Rise Of The Apes, One Day, 30 Minutes Or Less

jackanderson's standing in line to see the show tonight and there’s a light on.

I wanted to kill myself while reading what they wrote about Drive.

I guess I'm a stupid, idiotic moron then - I found Tinker Tailor a pretty tough to get through to be honest, which was kinda disappointing as I was really looking forward to it. I did, however, manage to appreciate certain aspects of the film and certainly wouldn't give a zero star review...In fact, it's done the opposite - I've got myself the book and will be checking it out soon enough.

I really need to find time to see Drive this week...

@skidd: When I say "Stupid? Idiotic? Moron?" I'm mainly referring to people who rate films on the extreme end of the scale. You give Joe Average the ability to rate something from zero to five, they will always go for either zero OR five. Often for no reason. At least she carefully organised her thoughts and used proper grammar and punctuation, however!

I'm seeing it this coming Friday so I'll be able to see if it's really worth the hype.

@Christina: There is plenty, plenty more where that came from. Trust me...

@Christina:

Whatever you do, don't visit the Fandango page for Drive. You'll see some reasonable comments, but the vast majority of them will be from silly people calling it the worst movie in existence and suggesting that Nicolas Winding Refn should be forever banned from film making.

@jackanderson: Not to worry, wasn't having a go at you. I get what you're saying.

I assumed The Inbetweeners Movie would do well, but I'm sickened by how well it's doing considering everything Inbetweeners related is just woeful. Glad to see Drive make some money, I'm definitely going to see it again next week I reckon.

You should totally give The Kids Are All Right a try. I didn't expect much from it but it's actually one of the better films from last year.

The reviews for both TTSS and Drive sound like they weren't written by the same person. Silly UK public.

@skidd: Glad we sorted that out!

@Greys: How come you hate The Inbetweeners? Just curious about that.

@Ferg: Two completely different people unfortunately. And people think Americans are bad!