So, Priest. That was a movie. It's also the only movie of this week's bunch that I've actually seen, but looking at the rest of these, I can't say that I'm too eager to remedy that situation. I would make a beeline for The Conspirator, as Robert Redford always makes films that are at least interesting, but I confess that I can't think of too many Civil War-era films that I find too interesting.
Heck, maybe I'll check out Something Borrowed just to jab myself in the eye a few times.
On the classier end of things, Pope would like you to know that Jane Eyre was a pretty damn good movie, but my experiences with the book make me want to shy away from it. WHO CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE.
 | 1. Priest I didn't like this film, precisely, in that it really has nothing to recommend for itself, but it's a lot better than it could've been. It's still not very good, though. |
 | 2. Something Borrowed I actually thought this looked mildly amusing in a way; the "friend zone" examinations often come from sexually frustrated men, so it seemed like it might've been interesting to see it from a lady point of view. When critics are throwing around phrases like "worst film of the year," though...I think that might be a sign to skip it. |
 | 3. The Conspirator This apparently isn't one of Robert Redford's better directorial films, and even though it went decently wide at 800 theaters, it still couldn't pull in an audience. Critical reaction was also pretty mediocre as well, despite what looked to be an entertaining cast. Oh well! Guess we'll have to wait for Spielberg's Lincoln project. |
 | 4. Jane Eyre Pope seemed to really dig this one, but damn did attempting to read Jane Eyre ever make me want to never read anything ever again. I got something like 80% of the way through it and then decided I didn't want to bother finishing it. Normally it only takes me a few pages to make that decision, so I can't say precisely why I got that far into it before giving up. |
 | 5. Hoodwinked Too! Hood VS. Evil Don't know anything about Hoodwinked! At all! Except that this is the latest in a series of money-losers for the Weinstein Company, returning around half its budget back in box office. |
 | 6. The Grace Card Cop has a son die, cop decides that it's God's fault. I'm going to go out on a limb here and guesstimate that the cop is going to come back into the flock before the movie's over. |
 | 7. Queen to Play Kevin Kline speaks French? I suppose I shouldn't be surprised since he looks like one of those French professors now who tries to hit on his students who are 30 years younger than he is. Maybe this is all some elaborate cosplay on his part. |
 | 8. The Bang Bang Club I'm trying real hard not to make a joke about wanting to take Malin Ackerman to the Bang Bang Club, but...but I just can't not do it. |
 | 9. The Ward So, it looks like John Carpenter's first film in like a decade was barely released into theaters before hitting DVD a month later. It looked awful from the get-go, and wasn't exactly critically beloved, but still...John Carpenter can't even muster a wide release nowadays. Sad. |
 | 10. Meet Monica Velour This always looked like a second-rate Boogie Nights crossed with Napoleon Dynamite, which is possibly the least appealing combination in movie history, but maybe...maybe it's good. I hold out the slightest hope for everything. |
