TV

I guess we're all supposed to hate this Bachelor contestant now.

I really loathe reality TV, which is why I rarely discuss it in these lists, but in case you want to hate yourself, feel free to check out two-hour episode of The Bachelor and The Voice tonight. I guess The Bachelor is the penultimate episode, as it's some kind of reunion thing where all the cast-off girls, who will clearly never succeed at anything since they failed to win the love of a winemaker, come back to talk about the show. The Voice, on the other hand, guest-stars the following people: Jewel, Lionel Richie, Alanis Morissette, Robin Thicke, Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds, Ne-Yo, Kelly Clarkson and Miranda Lambert. Apparently they were negotiating with the estate of Michael Jackson to feature his desiccated corpse, but negotiations feel through.

Between those two shows and two hours of Alcatraz, we're in the weird spot of having three networks showing two-hour episodes of shows at the same time on the same night. CBS is exclusively reruns for the evening, from HIMYM to Hawaii Five-0.

Also on Bravo is the series premiere of something called Love Broker, but goddamn if I'm going to talk about that.

	Hoarders A&E 9 PM: "A woman learns of her mother's secret life as a hoarder; a couple's home contains 500,000 books." Luckily for the hoarders, they've decided to get with the times and simply keep everything on a set of three Kindles. Followed by Intervention at 10.
	Alcatraz Fox 8 PM: "The facility's most violent brothers, Herman and Pinky Ames, find something amiss when they return to present-day Alcatraz; a man who became incredibly violent during his time in the prison returns." Two episodes airing back to back, so if you're in the mood for some Alcatraz, be prepared to tune in a bit earlier at 8 and stay up until 10.
	Being Human SyFy 9 PM: "Josh and Julia face their past; Sally is offered a job; Aidan and Suren get rid of Boston's fringe vampires." Those damn fringe vampires, always awkwardly ruining the hems of my outfits. I'll be glad to see them go. Followed by Lost Girl at 10.
	WWE Raw USA 9 PM: "The Rock confronts John Cena in Cena's own hometown of Boston." Why is the Rock still doing WWE stuff? I understand paying dues and all, but the guy's a bona fide movie star at this point.
	Smash NBC 10 PM: "Karen puts her talents to use at a government party; Michael and Julia's drama increases; Eileen joins forces with Tom's assistant; Ivy thinks something is amiss in her relationship with Derek." I'm not even going to pretend like I know anything about what this show is. I've heard it's Glee for adults, and that's what I'm sticking with.

Huh, so what's going to happen to last week's episode of Alcatraz? It didn't air because of the NASCAR thing, and it doesn't seem to be on Hulu or On Demand...

EDIT: Looks like it was rescheduled to March 12th? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alcatraz_(TV_series)#Episodes) So I guess you don't have to watch this show in order?

So glad that here in Britain we have nothing but quality television...

Shit. That's not true. At least I have a few episodes of Adventure Time and Regular Show to watch, and a few top gears (the brit version).

@Skywarpgold: I think that wikipedia page is wrong. I thought I read on the Alcatraz official site that last week's episode is airing tonight and this week's is just running as normal. So there wasn't going to be back-to-back episodes until the daytona 500 got pushed back.

So I guess its more Avatar the Last Airbender on Netflix than

curse you CBS! i marathon HIMYM on netflix for like 2 weeks, catch up on season 7, and you start doing reruns?!?! curse you again!

@Skywarpgold: They put that episode up online last week.

I'm going to finish watching some silly show that was on Nat Geo last night, theorizing how governments would respond to an alien invasion.

Smash actually surprised me with how good it is, I expected it to be completely terrible. The comparisons with Glee begin and end with the fact that they both feature musical numbers. There are far fewer numbers in Smash and they actually feel rather natural so far, not forced like with Glee.

@welshguy said:

So glad that here in Britain we have nothing but quality television...

Shit. That's not true. At least I have a few episodes of Adventure Time and Regular Show to watch, and a few top gears (the brit version).

You are doing the correct thing.

Tonight's Regular Show sounds so great, too! Muscle Man has to be a one-man party after everyone bails on his party? Party Pete in depressingly hilarious reverse? Sign me the fuck up!

Alcatraz any good? They've been on for a while now, haven't they.

@TheBojangler: ahhh, that would make sense.

@meaninoflife42: hmm, I don't think so...It's not on fox.com or Hulu.

Rorie, Rock is only back for Wrestlemania which is on April 1st. He's not there to stay.

@Skywarpgold: That's weird. I watched it a couple of days ago. I guess they took it off.

Rape?

@welshguy: We should just break the Americans gently by presenting them with TOWIE, followed by Brass Eye.

@meaninoflife42: oh wow, those sneaky bastards!

The back to back nature doesn't bode well for Alcatraz. Fox has been known to do that when they are trying to offload a show they don't feel comfortable with.