| Bruce Campbell | Consider yourself officially exempt from my wrath sweetcakes, and if you're lucky a little later I'll let you play with my boomstick. |
| Bruce Campbell | You don't know fear, kid. You've never worked with Sam Raimi. |
| Bruce Campbell | Try not to blow anybody until I get back. |
| Bruce Campbell | You know Jeff, I've gotten a lot of use out of chainsaws over the years. Killed a lot a zombies, saved a lot of lives, but at the end of the day when push comes to shove... they're just too damn heavy. |
| Bruce Campbell | You want a disaster? Anyone here seen Assault on Dome 4? | |
| Jeff | That's probably my favorite movie of... | |
| Bruce Campbell | Don't answer that. |
| Bruce Campbell | Where in the heck did you find this Evil Dead shampoo? | |
| Jeff | Bruce, that's drain cleaner. | |
| Bruce Campbell | Well, I guess that would explain the burning sensation. |
| Bruce Campbell | Jeff, I just have one request. | |
| Jeff | Anything Bruce. | |
| Bruce Campbell | Next time you unleash an ancient demon, call that Buffy chick. |
| Kasey | Hi, I'm Kasey, the famous singing prostitute. |
| Bruce Campbell | Well, hello Mr. Plot Point! |
| Domestic | $173,066 |
| Foreign | +$0 |
| 5/5 | |
| 4/4 | |
| 3/3 | |
| 2/2 | |
| 1/1 | |
| 0/0 |
| Domestic | $173,066 |