Today's New DVD / Blu-Ray Releases!

I don't know if I'm looking forward to the rumored "intense" sex scene in the next Twilight movie or I'm dreading it. I'm leaning to the latter. If K-Stew and R-Pat have sex on camera, how big of a black hole of anti-charisma would form?

People gave this movie a lot of shit, but it still made $76m in the U.S. and $260m worldwide. Gotta give Tom Cruise credit, he took a weird screenplay and made it into a movie that at least made some money back.

Now, this movie probably didn't make Disney any money, but that's probably because someone thought it'd be a good idea to spend $150 million on a movie that stars Jay Baruchel.

N-O-L-O-L.

Now here's a movie that didn't do as well as it should have, alas. If you're in the mood for a semi-raunchy, semi-sweet romantic comedy, I know what you'll be doing Tuesday night. Well, I actually don't, but hopefully it involves this movie somehow.

Did I say Going The Distance was raunchy? Well, it's got nothing on Cairo Time, let me tell you that. Nothing but the old in-and-out, if you know what I mean. (I mean sex.)

A comedy from India relating to farmers who commit suicide. Apparently it's great; it's India's official entry to next year's Oscars.

Inspired by a true story of a girl from a Mafia family who denounces the Mafia system that's killed her brother and father to a judge. Yay! But then the Mafia comes to extract vengeance on her. Boo!

This made a grand total of $531,000 dollars at the box office and has 11 producers (!). From the writer/director of Mac And Me. I'm watching the trailer right now and I had to rouse myself from a catatonic stupor after it was over. Although it might be good for something, as YouTube user "ValiumAlleyoop" says "i was the only one in the theatre and fapped like a champ".

Is there a better name for a badass character actor than Mads Mikkelsen? I mean, the dude's so crazy, the government made him put it right there in his name!

Although the repetition of the suffix in the title grates on my nerves (even Nabokov had the good sense to change the English title of "Invitation to an Execution" to "Invitation to a Beheading"), this is an apparently fascinating look at the Disney films of 1984-1994, which is regarded as the company's second great period. Worth checking out if you want a look at the behind-the-scenes scheming of the Eisner/Katzenberg years.

The 70-year-anniversary edition of one of Capra's "little man gets screwed by the system" films.

Fantasia and Fantasia 2000 come back in a combo pack, apparently to celebrate the appearance of their spiritual successor, The Sorcerer's Apprentice.

A Donnie Yen movie from 2005 comes to Blu-Ray. I hope it's...awesome?

Not the C.S. Lewis biopic that starred Anthony Hopkins, but rather some kind of low-budget, direct-to-dvd vampire film. Well-liked on Amazon, but less so elsewhere.

I consider myself to be on the bandwagon of Patrick Wilson, that dimpled, suave motherfucker. Movies he shot two years ago heading straight to DVD? Maybe I'll skip this one so as to not remove my rose-colored glasses.

Remember when the Sci-Fi Channel first started up and they played Space: 1999 over and over and over? To think that they would somehow move on to Megacat versus Octosquid. Relive the good old days with this Blu-Ray set of Season 1.