The big news in the world of Terrestrial British television this week is the rebranding of Channel Five. 5 (as it is now branded) back in July 2010 was purchased by media mogul Richard Desmond. Desmond ranked 57 on the Sunday times rich list (net worth £950 million) is the owner of the Express newspapers, OK! Magazine and a slew of adult subscription channels.
5 is the youngest of the United Kingdom’s former terrestrial analogue stations and its come a long way since March the 30 1997 where its schedule was filled with Red Shoe Diaries, Family Affairs and football. So the Channel that was once described as “Just Films, Football and F**king!” hopes to capture some of the TMZ magic with the new perspective.
Basic Instinct – 11:15pm – ITV2
A hard-drinking San Francisco cop investigates a grisly ice-pick murder - but his normally well-honed intuition starts letting him down as he falls for the sultry and manipulative chief suspect, the victim's former girlfriend. Thriller from director Paul Verhoeven, starring Sharon Stone, Michael Douglas.
Steven Seagal Vs. Justin Lee Collins – 10:00pm – Channel 5
The TV presenter crosses the Atlantic to visit the martial arts star at his home in Arizona. He investigates Seagal's many interests outside of the cinematic arena, including Buddhism, blues music, animal rights and environmental issues, and takes a behind-the-scenes look at his new TV series Southern Justice
Outcasts – 9:00pm – BBC1
The World’s worst place to be gay – 9:00pm – BBC3
For Crying out loud – 9:00pm – BBC4
Unmade Beds – 11:30pm – Film4
The Beauty of Books – 8:30pm – BBC4
Mad Men – 11:20pm – BBC2 Series 4 Episode 9/13
The Nutty Professor – 10:35pm – ITV1
An obese, terminally shy professor invents a potion that transforms him into a slim, loud-mouthed charmer. His new streamlined self immediately sets out to woo the woman of his dreams - but soon starts to ride roughshod over everything he used to care about. Remake of the 1963 Jerry Lewis comedy, starring Eddie Murphy,
The Brit Awards 2011 – 8:00pm – ITV1
James Corden hosts this year's star-studded ceremony from the O2, featuring performances by Take That, Tinie Tempah, Plan B, Rihanna, Mumford & Sons, Adele, Cee Lo Green and Arcade Fire. Urban artist Tinie Tempah leads the way with four nominations, including best British Single for Pass Out, and best British Male Solo Artist, competing against Mark Ronson, Paul Weller, Plan B and veteran rock star Robert Plant, who picks up his first-ever Brit Award nomination. Also in the running for prizes are X Factor winners Matt Cardle and Alexandra Burke alongside judge Cheryl Cole, Bruno Mars, Justin Bieber, David Guetta, Taio Cruz and the xx. The award for the best Breakthrough Act has been decided by votes from Radio 1 listeners
Worth watching
Nuns aloud – 11:20pm – BBC1
True Stories: War Child – 10:00pm – More4
Mad Men – 11:20pm – BBC2 Series 4 Episode 10/13
The Royal Tenenbaums – 11:30pm – BBC1
Three former child geniuses all grow up to be emotionally dysfunctional adults. Meanwhile, their estranged father learns his ex-wife is planning to remarry, so he pretends to be dying in a bid to regain his family's sympathy - and stop the wedding. Wes Anderson's comedy, starring Gene Hackman.
The Elephant: Life after Death – 9:00pm – Channel 4
Biologist Simon Watt leads a team of experts as they use remote cameras and night-vision equipment to examine what happens to the carcass of a recently deceased elephant in Tsavo West National Park in Kenya. The event leads to several days of feeding in which vultures, big cats and insects feast on the six million calories worth of fat, meat and guts left behind, providing an insight into the never-ending cycle of life and death
Madagascar – 8:00pm – BBC2
Champions League Live – 7:30pm – ITV1
The Grammy Awards – 10:00pm – ITV2
Mad Men – 11:20pm – BBC2 Series 4 Episode 11/13
TNA Against all odds – 10:00pm – Challenge TV
Four Brothers – 11:20pm – Film4
When their adoptive mother is killed in a robbery, her four sons reunite and swear vengeance on the murderers. But the background to her apparently random death turns out to be more complex than it first appeared, as the trail leads to corrupt cops and a notorious local gang boss. Thriller, starring Mark Wahlberg
Mad Men – 11:20pm – BBC2 Series 4 Episode 12/13
As the search for new business becomes increasingly frustrating, Don comes up with a risky strategy to change the company's fortunes - but his maverick approach leaves his colleagues outraged. Meanwhile, Sally receives good news from her psychiatrist, but Betty does not share the doctor's optimism. Drama, starring Jon Hamm.
Live UEFA Europa league football – 7:30pm – Channel 5
Skins – 10:00pm – E4
The Spice Trail – 9:00pm – BBC2
A L I E N – 9:00pm – Film4
The crew of a cargo spacecraft answer a distress call from a derelict alien spacecraft. However, their mission of mercy has fatal repercussions when a deadly, seemingly indestructible alien monster gets aboard their ship and starts killing them one by one. Ridley Scott's sci-fi horror, starring Sigourney Weaver.
Program of the day
Q.I. – 8:30pm – BBC 1
Stephen Fry hosts the quiz with a difference, joined by guests Barry Humphries, Bill Bailey and Rich Hall and regular panellist Alan Davies. The presenter asks questions on the subject of gravity, awarding points for the answers he finds most interesting.
Britain from Above – 8:30pm – BBC2
The Ruins – 11:30pm – BBC1
Hustle – 9:00pm – BBC1
Film of the day
A L I E N S – 9:00pm – More4
Lone survivor Ripley is rescued in deep space decades after an alien creature wiped out her ship's entire crew. She is recruited to accompany a military expedition to a colony on the planet where she first encountered the monster, only to find the aliens have been reproducing and there are now vast hordes of them. James Cameron's sci-fi thriller sequel, with Sigourney Weaver.
The Tudors – 10:00pm – BBC2
Henry discovers Katherine has been having an affair, resulting in the torture and painful death of her former lover - but his will not be the only execution as the king vents his fury. Drama, starring Jonathan Rhys Meyers
X-Men – 7:10pm – Channel4
Master and Commander: The far side of the world – 9:10pm – More4
Monster – 12:15am – Channel4
The Prestige – 10:00pm – BBC2
Duelling Victorian stage illusionists Robert Angier and Alfred Borden engage in a bitter personal and professional rivalry. The pair resort to increasingly brutal measures to sabotage each other's acts, while Angier becomes obsessed with the secret behind Borden's greatest illusion. Christopher Nolan's mystery thriller, starring Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale.
Top Gear – 8:00pm – BBC2
The presenters tackle the traffic chaos snowy weather causes in Britain, and hit upon a solution involving a combine harvester, some rudimentary engineering skills and a trip to Norway. Jeremy Clarkson tests the Audi RS5 and the BMW M3, and a surprising guest gets behind the wheel of the Reasonably Priced Car.
Wild at heart – 8:30pm – ITV1
Dancing on Ice – 6:35pm & 8:30pm – ITV1
Cool Runnings – 7:30pm – BBC3
A L I E N 3 – 9:00pm – More4