jackanderson (Level 26)

HA! HA! It's funny because he's short and she's woman! That's soooo F*CKING CLEVER!!!

James Cameron loves money. He really loves money. Why else do you think he decided to re-release Titanic in 3D 100 years after the maiden voyage of the original ship? To honour it? Don’t make me laugh! And, unfortunately, we Brits are Cameron’s b*tches (as well as James Cameron’s b*tches. BOOM!) so of course enough of us flocked to go see it to make it... sigh... our new box office number 1with nearly £2.8 million over the weekend. Double sigh...

So, The Hunger Games clearly isn’t taking the UK by as huge a megastorm as expected, failing to make it a threepeat. However, it still only dropped to second place with 20% less than last week. So, that’s proof that teenage girls are still relatively loyal to their favourite franchises in this day and age. Meanwhile, the other successful holdover from the previous weekend was The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists which managed a 14% increase in takings from last weekend. That’s a good thing by the way.

“But, how about those new releases?” I hear you cry. Well, bad news first, folks. Mirror, Mirror made some money. 2 million monies to be precise. However, some bright spark decided to release the film on a Monday and, as such, roughly half of its total is taken out, dumping it in fifth place. The Cold Light Of Day was up next and, apparently, the public didn’t fancy seeing another retread of Abduction and ignored it to death, with a seventh place opening and £500,000 in ticket sales.

In limited release, Headhunters, the Norwegian comedy/thriller/drama thing that I told you all to see in the Month In Movies feature, did really rather well. It debuted just outside the top 10, at number 11, with £254,920 from 83 screens. This Must Be The Place, the Sean Penn fronted indie drama, managed £42,287 from 18 screens. And the Oscar nominated (despite it coming out in 2010) A Cat In Paris only took £5,592 from 21 screens proving that unless you’re by Aardman, Disney, DreamWorks or Pixar, if you are an animated film you are not making money.

Prepare to experience the cold light of a full list! Yep... You’re glad I’m back aren’t you?

UK Box Office Results: 6th April 2012 - 8th April 2012

	1. Titanic 3D £2,759,994 / £2,856,540 / NEW (In A Way) You know, James Cameron could have remade this in his back yard with the amount of money he has. And, yet, he takes the cheap route. Why not try something different? Why not spruce it up for the modern age? Why not replace Leonardo DiCaprio with Josh Hutcherson? Kate Winslet with Mary Elizabeth Winstead (because I don’t need to explain myself to you!)? A soundtrack composed of acts like Dappy and Chris Brown? And all the men should be shirtless and the women should be permanently shown in side boob! And brooding! Lots and lots of brooding! Hold on a second, I need to go patent this ingenious idea...
	2. The Hunger Games £2,394,782 / £15,168,889 No, during my wilderness sabbatical (where I totally betrayed you guys and started writing for a videogames website instead) I did not see The Hunger Games. I intended to. Once. For about 15 minutes. Then I remembered 21 Jump Street, The Pirates, The Cabin In The Woods, The Avengers... It was then I realised that I will not succumb to peer pressure and see what films are "popular" and that I will, instead, stick to my own schedule! Suck it, teenage girls! Who needs ‘em, eh?
	3. The Pirates! In An Adventure With Scientists £2,166,162 / £7,716,061 Seeing this next weekend. Not this weekend, this weekend I’m throwing all my money at The Cabin In The Woods, but definitely next weekend. It’s Aardman, why would I miss it?
	4. Wrath of the Titans £1,368,131 / £5,351,400 So this is doing well, but not as well as Clash. Does this mean that, gasp, people actually learnt their lesson and decided to skip the sequel to the film they didn’t enjoy the first time around and spend their money elsewhere on more enjoyable ventures? Well, er, obviously not. The film’s already made a profit. So, expect more wondrous adventures of the Greek who suspiciously sounds like an Australian to clog up your cinemas in two year’s time!
	5. Mirror, Mirror £1,138,282 / £2,389,033 / NEW Still hasn’t made its budget back worldwide yet. I mean, it will, but us knee-jerk Internet commenters are now completely free to call this a major bomb! It failed! Huzzah! Post your own sh*tty, Caruso style jokes against this movie in the comments. I’ll be sure to repeatedly take off and put on a cool pair of shades every time I read one.
	6. 21 Jump Street £845,869 / £7,331,740 I did, however, see this over the weekend and thought it was hilarious. A tonne of the best jokes were spoiled in the trailer but what do you expect from a 4 minute trailer (seriously, who honestly thought that would be a good idea)? However, the film was still brilliant and I’m glad it’s getting a sequel. But they must bring back Brie Larson! I know it will make little sense story and joke wise, but it just makes me happy seeing Envy Adams in films.
	7. The Cold Light of Day £503,985 / NEW Fun Fact: Bruce Willis is in 7 movies this year. 7. Dude’s *57 years old*! That’s impressive; however you try and slice it.
	8. The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel £451,307 / £17,737,576 Never actually got around to seeing this. Can someone tell me if it was any good? I did, however, watch as this and The Woman In Black took turns at the number 1 slot for close to a month. Well, actually, it was more like 2 weeks because then I got Mass Effect 3 and everything else in my life basically vanished (still haven’t finished it, though, and I will cut you if you spoil it for me). VEEEEEDEIOGAAAAYMMEEESSS!!!
	9. StreetDance 2 £424,833 / £1,953,260 Before somebody angrily comments to point it out to me, I’ve used the original StreetDance as the entry placeholder here because the sequel isn’t in the database yet (I’m waiting on the mods to approve my submission before I’m able to fix that). I don’t know why because this seems like Film of the Year material.
	10. Housefull 2 £361,640 / £396,475 / NEW Urgh. Bollywood. The bane of my film blogging existence due to me never having anything to write about it. We meet again... On far more interesting notes: have you seen the Ted trailer yet? If not, do so! It looks great (and here was me thinking I’d never get to say that about a non-American Dad Seth MacFarlane project again). Oh, and they’re re-releasing the Scott Pilgrim books... in hardback and colour! *I MUST HAVE!!* Yep, it’s good to be back.

Dropped Out: The Devil Inside, We Bought A Zoo, Contraband, Into The Abyss

Callum Petch finds it strange seeing your twin in the bathroom, yeah, yeah, when you don’t even know you had one. (Freezepop, b*tches!)

jackanderson (Level 26)

UK Box Office Results: 6th April 2012 - 8th April 2012

Wormholes and Revelations: My Trip to CERN, The LHC, and The ATLAS Experiment

ONE PIECE #600 - - Special Review