Withnail & I (1987)

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Plot

 
Withnail & I tells the story of two out of work actors, who are perpetually intoxicated, in 1969.
 
Upon the realisation that they have no money for booze and that no only is their Camden flat in a state of utter squalor, but they also have no heating (Withnail is reduced to smearing himself in Deep Heat for warmth) or other common amenities such as fridges, they decide they need to get away from it all and have a holiday.
 
The pair visit Withnail's uncle Monty, a homosexual who makes frequent sexual allusions towards I as well as displaying antagonistic behaviour towards his cat, to ask if they can stay in his cottage in Penrith, Cumbria. After some amount of secretive discussion between Withnail and Monty Withnail and I receive the keys to the cottage.
 
After an arduous journey from London to Penrith through the pouring rain in a beat up Jaguar MK2 with a broken headlight and only one working windscreen wiper, Withnail & I arrive at Monty's cottage to discover it is completely lacking in modern facilities, such as heating and electricity. Eventually they manage to gather some fuel for the stove to heat the cottage; they approach the local farmer (whose leg is wrapped in polythene) to try and purchase food and get into an incident where I has to face down a bull to get it back into its field.
 
In the evening Withnail & I journey to the village pub where they come into contact with Jake the poacher who tells them that he's been watching them and informs Withnail that he "Needs working on boy!" which Withnail perceives as a threat. Having returned to the cottage Withnail insists that they sleep in the same room as he is afraid that Jake will come for them. When they hear someone entering the house and coming up the stairs they huddle up together in fear, only for Monty to enter the room and perceive them as two lovers in an embrace.
 
With Monty with them in the cottage tensions rise as Monty is constantly flirting with and making passes at I, making him very awkward, so that he frequently pushes for them to leave, while Withnail seems to be thoroughly enjoying himself. During an incident where I narrowly avoids being raped by Monty it is revealed that Withnail has been lying to Monty telling him that he and I are lovers and fabricating a past as a  rent-boy for I (he claims it was the only way to get Monty to give him the cottage).
 
Upon I receiving a telegram that he has an audition for a part Withnail & I return home to London (on the journey Withnail is pulled over by the police for drunk driving) and find numerous bills and notices of eviction, along with their drug dealing acquaintance Danny and his friend the Presuming Ed, waiting for them in the flat.
 
I calls his agent and is told they want him to play the lead. With his hair now cut short he is prepared to leave alone, but Withnail insists on accompanying him at least some of the way. The pair part in Regent's Park in the rain, and the film ends with Withnail reciting "What a piece of work is a man" from Act II Scene II of Hamlet before walking off into the distance while they camera remains still.
 
 

Quotes

 
Withnail: "Is that soup? why haven't I got any soup?!"
I: "It's coffee."
Withnail: "Why don't you drink it out of a mug like a normal person?"
I: "Why don't you wash up once in a while like a normal human being?"
Withnail: "How dare you! How dare you call me inhumane!"
 
Withnail: "I feel like a pig shat in my head!"
 
I: "Monty you terrible cunt!"
 
Monty: "Flowers are like tarts for the bees."
 
Danny: "So there's judge sitting there in a cape like Batman with this really rather far out looking hat."
Withnail: "Wig."
Danny: "No man, this was more like a long white hat."
 
Danny: "Don't get uptight with me man, 'cause if you do I'll have to give you a dose of medicine, and if I spike you you'll know you've been spoken to."
Withnail: "You wouldn't spike me, you're too mean. Besides there's nothing invented I couldn't take!"
Danny: "If I medicined you, you'd think a brain tumour was a birthday present."